Calling all the tortured souls, I heard it was a warm, sunny summer. I wouldn't know. After the undergrads do there last exam and scatter over the country people like me are locked in the dungeons under the Main Building, on a daily ration of dry bread, water, and floggings. (For the last bit bored-out-of-their-brains-after-the-season football hooligans are invited.) Only to be let out after a peer-reviewed publishable article is produced. So next time you curse the author of a unreadable article, remember the lonely poor bugger having a mental breakdown in a dark, damp, cold, moss-lined cell. Anyway, they let me out last week, my eyes blinked in the sunlight. They'll send me to Spain for two weeks to strengthen and tan, so the academia keeps its reputation as a good employer. I'll try to fall in love, to have at least one summer memory, however, that will be hard since after two months in solitary confinement all conversation seems to be an exoteric, ancient custom, that never touch the primal thoughts from between four walls from which the howling scream for existence does not escape. I look for the eyes: for the signs of a kinderd spirit. However, before I go let me share my distraughted thoughts on Keswick. I did not determine the ascents and distances yet but a number of walks sprouted from my mangled mind. 1) Blencathra via sharp edge. (Kicked off the bus before Keswick, and only via sharp edge when there is no hard wind or rain:"nobody dies on my watch," as Demi would say.) 2) Skiddaw, via Little Man and Carl Side 3) High Seat, Bleaberry Fell, and Walla Crag. 4) Cat Bells and lake side. 5) Grag Hill and/of Grisedale Pike (kicked off the bus in Braithwaite). 6) Around the lake, Walla Crag. 7) Lake side and forest walk. (extended AA-recommended, bring your biology books.) This is not the final version, I'll take the maps with me to Spain. I'll hear what YOU think on Sunday the 21st, or in the week before the walk on the 27th! Your truly most lost soul: Norbert